Just Write

Yes, I am the weaker vessel

2012-04-15T16:56:00.004-07:00

Likewise, you husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. -1 Peter 3:7 (KJV2000)

All this political chatter about the "war on women" has got me thinking. If there is, in fact, a war on women, shouldn't I, as a women, feel attacked? Not literally, of course, but shouldn't I feel that my choices are, in some way, being questioned by the gender hierarchy (whoever they may be)? I ask because I don't feel relegated into a sub-segment of the sex. Looking at my life, and the choices I make, you would think I'd fit nicely into a tiny little divot along the gender spectrum. I typically don't feel like an outsider but when I look at the wider landscape of the country, maybe I should.

I don't view my decisions as controversial or outside of the norm. That being said, I homeschool my kids. I believe that our country was founded squarely upon Godly principles. I exercise my Second Amendment right. I believe I am the weaker vessel in my marriage...and I'm ok with that. It's this last idea that seems the most controversial especially in light of the "feminist movement."

While many women feel the need to be fiercely independent and vocally express their desire for "equality" on every level, I am reminded every day that I am not equal to my husband. Does that make me less valuable/intelligent/important? Of course not. We each have a role in our relationship, in our family, in our community and in our world. I am not designed to do his job, as he is not designed to do mine. As the "weaker" vessel, I trust my husband to be the head of our household. He's designed for that role. He demonstrates the strength to bear the weight of our struggles (no I'm not speaking in purely literal terms here) and the humility to treat me with patience and tenderness. Does this mean I am not strong or humble? No. But we are clearly designed differently...and complimentary.

In my view, embracing "feminism" means accepting my acceptance of my role in marriage. If I am going to feel attacked (in this war on women) on any level, I suppose this is the area where the spears would fly. Still, I don't feel it. I just can't imagine any argument or situation in which my mind would be changed. This isn't a principle given by man, but by God (very much like the rights named in our Founding Documents). So, does embracing my role as the weaker vessel make me....weak? Not at all. In fact, I am stronger in my faith and in my relationship because of it.

How to find your CO caucus - No excuses!

2012-02-02T16:13:00.000-08:00

I've heard from plenty of friends and neighbors that they aren't planning on attending their caucus on Tuesday because they don't know where it is. Well, here is the only link you'll need to locate your caucus. Plug in your info and you'll immediately find out where you're suppose to go on Feb. 7 at 7pm. I promise, the caucus will be close and relatively short. I really hope you try to attend, though I understand that, just as I celebrate the opportunity to participate in the process, I acknowledge the right to do just the opposite. To each his own.

Apathy is ugly - The Colorado Caucus

2012-01-31T15:21:00.001-08:00

Apathy is an ugly word. It even makes my face contort when I say it. A-pa-thy. Try to look pretty as you say it. It can't be done. There's nothing worse when it comes to a political election. As much as I can't stand it, that's exactly what I experienced as I walk my neighborhood promoting our caucus next week. The most frequent response from my neighbors was, "Nope. Not going." Excuse me, what? I'm shocked. Not going? I cannot imagine throwing my hands up like that...completely abandoning any power I have as a citizen and voter.

The only logical conclusion I can make is that they just don't understand the process. Why else would you not attend your caucus? I don't blame them...it's a confusing process that takes some effort to understand. Perhaps the fact that it's not just a "show up and vote" event causes the majority to shy away.

Our caucus takes place at a neighbor's home. Sometimes they're held in schools ,VFW facilities or in similar buildings. They usually run an hour or so and, typically, not very many people show up. Still, caucuses are excellent examples of grassroots politics. They offer a chance for you to meet your neighbors, chat about issues that are important to you, stump for a candidate and vote (in our case, the caucus is a straw poll so it's non-binding, but still important... just ask any candidate). I'm looking forward talking politics without people looking at me like I have three heads. Civilized debate is welcomed here. Ahhhh.

Caucuses also give you a chance to vote for your precinct delegates (or become one!) and committee people. Think these aren't important roles? These people represent you at the county, congressional, state and national conventions. They also help decide what candidates appear on your ballot and how money is allocated in your district. Not important??

I've heard some say they don't want to go because they "don't like talking politics," or "sometimes it just gets too heated." I've even heard people say, "We're too far gone. Caucusing won't make a difference." I'm going to say it....A-PA-THY. Yep, it's still ugly. Sure, the conversation may get a bit heated but is there a better topic to get fired up about than the direction of our country?? Sorry, but I can't think of any.

If you don't know where to go, check your party's county web site. I'm in Jefferson County, so I found my caucus information here: http://www.jeffcorepublicans.com/index.php/en/. Do a simple search, plug in your address and show up. Easy. This is a rare opportunity to participate in our legislative process and to drive policy from the BOTTOM UP. Is that not worth the effort?

If you support the Department of Education, please tell me WHY?

2012-01-25T12:48:00.001-08:00

As a homeschooling mom, I suppose it's in my DNA to oppose the existence of the Department of Education but I do so with conviction and facts to back up my beliefs. Of all of the things we've entrusted to our government (retirement, health care, the environment, charity, etc. etc.) perhaps the most shocking, to me, is the education of our children.

Most of us can agree that government is, in a word, INEPT. Yet, we are expected to trust that the Department of Education has everything taken care of when it comes to educational standards, benchmarks, facilities and schedules. Why? Where does this blind trust come from? We have become so dependant that most parents feel completely unable to assume responsibility for their child's education (or, perhaps, they just don't want to. It is easier, after all, to just leave it all to the government).

People think I'm crazy when I speak of my disgust for the Department of Education but few are able to articulate the reasons why they support its existence. I am a reasonable person able to make decisions based on facts. So, if I am overlooking actual (and by actual, I mean real) facts, I am open to hearing them.

The latest issue of Imprimus, a publication of Hillsdale College, addresses this very issue. If you haven't already, please read this piece from Charles Murray, the W.H. Brady Scholar at the American Enterprise Institute. Murray makes the case that the Department of Education is unconstitutional, spends ridiculous amounts of money with virtually no measurable improvement to education and is basically at the mercy of the education lobby groups. Since its inception in 1980, the state of education has not improved and we continue to churn out college graduates who have learned nothing, are in debt and are often unemployable. Is this system worth maintaining? Help me out. If you believe in the Department of Education, please tell me why.

Just FYI, "The American Enterprise Institute is a community of scholars and supporters committed to expanding liberty, increasing individual opportunity and strengthening free enterprise. AEI pursues these unchanging ideals through independent thinking, open debate, reasoned argument, facts and the highest standards of research and exposition. Without regard for politics or prevailing fashion, we dedicate our work to a more prosperous, safer and more democratic nation and world."

My husband quit his job to audition for Idol...and I'm cool with that.

2012-01-19T20:42:00.000-08:00

I am not a fan of American Idol. I mean, it's mildly entertaining but I have a few problems with it. First of all, I think they are cruel to make fun of vunerable people who are, ahem, just not that talented. Second of all, I cannot handle the fact that the show completely takes over television. Do we really need to see 2 hours of auditions in 10 different cities 5 nights a week (Ok, slight exaggeration)? Finally, I'm so sick of people worshipping the idea of American Idol -- the quick path to fame -- the Golden Ticket.

My hubby, on the other hand, loves Idol so I endure it when I can. Well, that was the plan at least. After last night (the first night of season 11), the plan may change. I understand that people like to see some of the stories behind the contestants but when one of those stories involves a husband quitting his job to audition, I just can't take it.

This guy was cute. He was a good singer. He was from a small town (which, I would presume, probably doesn't have a ton of options when it comes to employment). Perhaps most disturbing (for me), is that his wife is about to have a baby and she totally supported this decision. What is she thinking? Um, our economy isn't stellar right now. Jobs are scarce and he quit his to "follow his dream." I'm all for dreams, but at a certain point in life, you buckle down and do what you need to do to survive -- to support your family. Bottom line: I so would NOT be ok with that.

I'll give the guy credit for confidence but if he can win Idol (I'm assuming he thinks he can, since he quit his job to do so) there has to be another way to be discovered -- perhaps one that doesn't involve walking away from gainful employment and towards an uncertain future (one that certainly involves a wife and newborn). Before we were married, I would have totally supported my hubby if he wanted to go crazy to follow a dream. But, the game changes once you have actual responsibilities -- a family. I can only hope that this particular contestant goes all the way or is able to find a job to support his family when he returns to Appomattox.

There's an appropriate time for everything and, on a certain level, I think we all understand that...unless a carrot full of quick fame promises is dangled in front of our face. Why is that life so much better than a simple one full of hard work, small town quirks and family? It isn't...unless you watch American Idol.

Sarah's Key - A (Tearful) Review

2012-01-18T08:12:00.000-08:00

Shortly after my husband and I were married, we were sitting in our hotel room in the Dominican Republic. He was slipping through the t.v. stations and I was on the bed flipping through the final chapters of The Notebook. As I turned the last page, I burst into tears and my husband immediately dropped the remote and rushed to my side.

I'm not a big crier, so he was obviously alarmed. Through sloppy tears, I tried to explain to share the powerful message of this book and the heartbreak I felt I was experiencing after reading it. He just stared at me, not sure of how to react. Of course, he couldn't understand a word I was saying so, after he realized I was not in physical pain, he started laughing hysterically at my emotional breakdown. I wanted to hurt him.

We laugh about it now, but I'm really glad he wasn't by my side last night as I finished reading Sarah's Key. Wow. Talk about emotional. I read at night before bed but found myself thinking about the story of Sarah and Julia during the day as if they were walking with me. I couldn't escape the horror of the brutal Vel' d'Hiv' roundup and imagined myself in Sarah's shoes on that fateful July morning in Paris, 1942.

While the story is fictional, the book is based on the very real experiences of French Jews during World War II. In the spirit of some of my favorite books of all time, All Quiet on the Western Front and A Farewell to Arms, author, Tatiana de Rosnay, invites the reader to experience a historical event through the eyes of her expertly developed characters.

Sarah's story is truly devastating. Heartbreaking. Almost unbelievable...if you didn't know it could be true. This innocent child transformed into a hardened and scarred woman virtually incapable of experiencing joy at the hands of a world that completely discounted her existence. How could this happen? I couldn't even hold back the waterworks until the last page turned. Usually, when I love a book, I am crushed when it ends. In this case, the ending was satisfying. Kudos to de Rosnay for her perfect timing (sometimes an author just doesn't know when to call it quits). After I (somewhat) pulled myself together, I hovered over my sleeping children and thanked God for their rhythmical breath -- for their carefree giggles -- for their warm and sticky hugs.

Simply put, I LOVE THIS BOOK. I am better for reading it -- which is rare.

My homeschooled kids are under the microscope

2012-01-13T22:10:00.000-08:00

Not too long ago, it was cute when one of my kids mispronounced a word or failed to conjugate a verb correctly. I rarely corrected them because I felt their lack of language skills demonstrated a sweet sort of innocence that I wasn't ready to leave behind. I figured they have plenty of time to pour over grammar workbooks, diagram sentences (do people even do that anymore?) and ponder the use of a dangling participle.

That was before homeschooling.

Now, whether right or wrong, I feel a bit under the microscope when it comes to the way my children speak. When we're out and about during the day (when most kids are in school), many people stop to ask my children why they aren't in school or what they're doing at Target in the middle of a Wednesday. I tend to hold my breath and pray that they answer in complete, well-formed sentences. Most of the time, they do. Whew!

Now, saying "winned" instead of "won" isn't so much cute as it is a reflection on my teaching skills. True, this probably isn't the best way to approach my first year of homeschooling but all of these little mistakes leave me making mental notes at a furious pace. Should you open up my brain, you're sure to find a road map of red Sharpie scribbles and notes all designed to make tomorrow's homeschool day better.

Homeschooling has taught me that everything my kids do or say can be traced directly back to something I've taught them, or failed to teach them. That's really the essence of parenting, isn't it? Eventually, the responsibility for their words and actions will fall squarely and completely on their shoulders, but for now, I'm hyper-sensitive to each and every move they make. Exhausting? You bet. Worth it? Absolutely.

Ronald Reagan's Christmas address 1981

2011-12-25T18:23:00.000-08:00

This wasn't that long ago, but I wonder if a President would speak so plainly about the true meaning of Christmas today. As always, to-the-point and eloquent. My kids will listen to this today with me. God bless us, every one.

The problem with Santa.

2011-12-24T08:32:00.000-08:00

It's Christmas Eve morning and I've officially HAD IT with Santa. My kids are obsessed with the presents under the tree, even though I've done everything I can to keep them focused on Christ during this circus of a season. They know the importance of giving, at least intellectually, but the lure of shiny wrapping paper and colorful bows seems to mesmerize them.

Every year, my goal is to have 3 presents for each child on Christmas, since that's how many Jesus received. We put them out well before Christmas morning because I want them to realize that Santa didn't bring them anything. Still, they expect their presents to multiply on Christmas morning. I've gone back and forth on how to explain this lack of multiplication. I want to tell them that Santa skipped our house because we don't need anything from him but that statement validates his existence (doesn't it?). I could just completely debunk the Santa myth but I've been told that would be harsh (really?). Santa is taking up way more of my mental bandwidth than I would like. But how do I escape?

How do you handle Santa in your house? I am desperately resisting the urge to gather up every present under the tree and hand them out to random people in the Target parking lot or on any city street. It shouldn't be such an uphill battle to shake the excess off and focus on the fact that a sweet little baby came into this world to die for ME. But, here we are again, fighting that battle. Any tips on how to win it?

The Bungalow by Sarah Jio - A Review

2011-11-11T12:26:00.000-08:00

Sarah Jio gave me one of the best birthday presents…and I’ve never even met her. My birthday was on Wednesday and I just wanted an afternoon to tackle the pile of unread books I’ve accumulated on my nightstand and iPad. Simple, right? Graciously, my husband obliged and I was able to indulge in hours of uninterrupted literary bliss. Yes, this makes me happy – very, very happy.

I finished the final two chapters of a book I had been working on for a month, digested a few chapters of an economics books I’ve been reading (for a year!) and started Sarah Jio’s new novel, The Bungalow. That was the plan anyway.

Time swallowed me up as day turned to night. Before I knew it, it was midnight and I turned the last page of The Bungalow. Seriously. I finished it in a single sitting…and I couldn’t imagine doing it any other way. Sometimes when you read a book, there is a natural place to grab the bookmark and pause. Not the case with The Bungalow. I just couldn’t stop.

I love wartime fiction. There’s something about a story unfolding with the backdrop of international tension, boundless courage and unknown outcomes that sucks me in -- if that story is a romance, even better. The Bungalow is an emotional story of uncertain love, true love, the lure of stability, the ugliness of pride and the beautiful intertwining of lives through generations.

The skillful, clean writing that Jio exemplified in her first novel, The Violets of March, pours over into The Bungalow, making it a true pleasure to read. It flows so effortlessly from one scene to the next while carrying the reader from a wealthy Seattle neighborhood to the jungle of Bora-Bora. As I turned the final page, I literally wanted to hug the book. Had I not been reading on my iPad, I would have (one disadvantage of e-reading: the hugs aren’t quite as satisfying).

Thanks, Sarah, for the awesome birthday present. I wasn’t expecting to spend my evening with Anne and Westry, but I’m so glad I did.

Success with Honor?

2011-11-10T13:21:00.000-08:00

I just read the entire Grand Jury report from the Jerry Sandusky investigation. I wish I hadn’t. I felt compelled because the entire story has been so disturbing and there was just so much speculation swirling around all of the commentary. The only way to get around all of the emotion was to go to the source and read the facts, as presented to the Grand Jury.

I don’t think anyone should be commenting on this painfully disgusting story until they read the Report. Once you do, I’m convinced that there’s only one way to view Sandusky: as a perverted serial abuser with an ego a million times bigger than his conscience. His behavior was repeatedly horrendous – shockingly so – yet he continued to prey on young kids without anyone questioning him. Sure, some said his behavior was odd but appropriate outrage was nowhere to be found. I believe he felt invincible and empowered to continue his crime spree by the lack of action taken against him.

Evidence of the deterioration of our society is plain to see when you consider how many people could have stopped Sandusky’s sickening pursuit of innocent children. Is this who we are? How does a 28 year old man not beat Sandusky to a pulp when he walks in on him seriously abusing a 10 year old boy on Penn State property? How did he turn and walk away? My heart breaks for that child, as well as the other victims (who really knows how many there were?). On top of it all, Sandusky met most (if not all) of these kids through The Second Mile Foundation, a charity he established to help at-risk youth. Revolting.

The reaction to the firing of Joe Paterno over this mess is embarrassing. Rioting? Really? Clearly, football is more important to these students than protecting children. These weren’t white collar crimes or crimes against capable adults. These were little kids who were manipulated and forever changed by a man they trusted. I don’t know Paterno, but he strikes me as a guy who likes to be in control. To think that he did not know the true extent of the situation is far-fetched at best. No, he didn’t do nearly enough. If you have even the slightest inclination that a child (let along, multiple children) is being hurt, you make it your mission to figure it out. You pursue the truth…because the child cannot.

Sandusky is pure evil. The people who turned their heads are equally as repulsive. Penn State’s priority should be education, not football. Sure, it’s great to have a powerhouse team, a respected coach and a long-standing legacy, but not at the expense of morals and basic human decency. As a mother, to say that I’m nauseated by this situation is an understatement. I appreciate Paterno’s contribution to NCAA football, but I wonder what Sandusky’s victims think about his “Success with Honor” mantra. Actually, I think I have a pretty good idea….

Disclaimer: I cannot bring myself to link to the Grand Jury Report, but a quick web search should uncover it. Proceed with caution.

Agoraphobics in Love

2011-08-19T08:52:00.000-07:00

How is your summer reading going so far? I love this time of year because reading just seems to come with the territory. Whether I'm reading on the iPad or have an old-fashioned paper version in my hands, it seems I'm always processing a story.

Right now I'm working on a gigantic historic non-fiction, an adventure on the e-reader and an advance copy of a much anticipated novel. Sometimes you don't need to dive into a full-length novel to be transported. Case in point: Agoraphobics in Love by Lisa Tucker. This charming short story was just what I needed to refresh my summer reading plan. It's available only for an e-reader and it's only a 99-cent download! This sweet story is worth way more than 99-cents.

What crazy thing have you done for love? Tucker will inspire you to consider this question as you turn the e-pages of this short story. The fact that Tucker is able to develop adorably quirky characters that evoke an emotional response from the reader in such a short amount of time is a true testament to her ability as a writer.

Agoraphobics in Love is a refreshing, honest and light-hearted read that should definitely be included on your summer reading list. Oh, and did I mention it's only 99-cents!!! Love it.

Our homeschooling journey begins.

2011-07-09T21:37:00.000-07:00

I wasn't expecting our first day homeschooling to go the way it did. All three of my kids were up before me. Eden made breakfast for all of them and then carefully put the dirty dishes in the sink. As I walked down the stairs, I heard them saying the Pledge of Alligence and then walked up to see them standing at attention, hands on their hearts facing the flag on our mantle. I was shocked, to say the least. Ok, I guess they're ready to jump right in.

I wasn't prepared for their level of preparation. After the Pledge and a serious rendition of My Country 'Tis of Three, they looked at me expectantly. Even though I had spent the past week preparing for this day, I froze. What now? Oh yeah, downstairs to the "classroom" to start the day's lesson. All three students eagerly marched behind me as I descended the stairs.

Two minutes later, we were sitting around their mini art table, books open in front of us, and their attitudes had changed. I realized then that they expected homeschooling to be a big party at home. Perhaps they looked forward to a permanent pajama party complete with games, movies and an endless supply of snacks. Once then realized that we would actually be learning (or trying to), their willingness took a collective turn for the worse.

We've been at it for about a month now and I can't say they've been cooperative. I've been met with far more push-back them I expected and I'm honestly not sure how to handle it. I sometimes relive those first few moments when I saw them standing in the living room, excited for the day ahead. How quickly they've turned. Regardless, I'm pressing on. They've been asking me, "How long are we going to homeschool?" Sometimes I want to tell them, "This is our last day!" But I know the real answer is, "As long as God tells us to."

Am I crazy for taking this on? Am I going to be able to do this? Will I ever have a life again? These questions and more circulate through my head on a daily basis but I know I'm doing the right thing. One of Eden's teachers (pre-homeschooling) taught her to take deep breaths by telling her to "smell the flower, blow out the candle." I've been doing alot of that lately. Alot.

And so, our journey begins. This should be good.

Here, Home, Hope: A Review

2011-05-28T19:15:00.000-07:00

Have you ever considered changing the course of your life…even though you are firmly grounded in your present reality? Kaira Rouda explores this idea in her new novel, Here, Home, Hope. This is the story of Kelly Johnson, a mom of two and loyal wife who finds herself no longer content with her comfortable suburban existence. She begins to question whether being comfortable is a good thing and decides to dust off some buried dreams. In the process, she rediscovers the importance of friendship, becomes a mentor and witnesses the power of identifying exactly what it is she wants in life.

When you finally turn the last page of this book, you’ll probably feel like you just took a long walk with you best friend. Rouda’s expertly crafts a comfortable and creative plot that is just complex enough for an enjoyable bedside read. Most, if not all, women can relate to the theme of transition which is weaved through Kelly’s interactions with her friends (both new and old), her neighbors, her husband, even her social nemesis. My feelings toward Kelly ranged wildly between wanting to smack her, hug her, cry with her, cheer her on and share a bottle of wine with her. The up-and-down relationship I cultivated with Kelly in the pages of this book is exactly what kept me intrigued.

Whether you are lying on the beach, by the pool or on a lawn chair in the backyard in the next few months, Here, Home, Hope is the perfect summer companion. It's 'chick lit' at its best.

The Atlas of Love - A Review

2011-04-02T10:13:00.000-07:00

How do you define family? Is it limited to blood relatives or can this title encompass relationships that are cultivated through life's experiences? Laurie Frankel's The Atlas of Love redefines what it means to be a family and asks readers to examine the strength and fortitude of their own relationships. . .space space spacespace space This is the story of three friends and their adventures in parenting, although only one of them actually gave birth. When Jill finds out she's pregnant, she almost immediately finds out that her boyfriend isn't interested in being a father. As he pulls away, her two friends, Janey and Katie, pull closer. Faced with the reality of an impending birth, the three friends decide to work together to raise Jill's baby. . ,space space spacespace space pacespace space space The concept seems a bit whimsically and, on the surface, barely realistic, but they do what they can to make it work. Nobody is prepared for the enormity of the task, which they quickly realize is not defined by a plethora of lollipops and roses. The situation brings with it "family" dynamics to which any mother, daughter or close friend can relate. . .sace spcae scspace space spcae Frankel is simply a gifted writer. Her characters are well-developed, intriguing and thoughtful. The dialog is witty and well-paced. The plot is imaginative but curiously realistic. Overall, just a truly enjoyable read that makes you appreciate the friends you have and look forward to the relationships you'll forge in the future.

Skipping a Beat - A Review

2011-02-17T12:22:00.000-08:00

Not long ago, I was sitting in the Charlotte airport, en route to Gainesville, desperate for sleep after a very uncomfortable red eye from Denver. My exhausted body was telling me to curl up under a bench, pull my sweater over my head and sleep for a precious few minutes. But my restless mind wouldn't allow it. I only had one more chapter left in Sarah Pekkanen's new book, Skipping a Beat, and I had to finish before I could ever think about sleeping.

After turning the last page, I quickly sent Sarah (who I do not know personally, but she did send me an advanced copy of her book) an email saying, "Damn you for not letting me sleep!" quickly followed by, "Brilliant work!" I adored this story. It is my favorite kind of book...the kind that lures me into my bed each night with the promise of another unexpected twist in the story. I kept telling myself (and my husband), 'Just one more chapter,' which turned into at least 4 or 5 a night.

Although I really connected with Sarah's first book, The Opposite of Me, her second effort grabbed my heart. Anyone who is married (or otherwise committed, long-term) will appreciate Pekkanen's candid look at the emotional ups and downs of relationships, in this case, in light of tremendous want and extraordinary success. On one hand, her words validated my own frustrations towards life's drama. On the other, she left me contemplating the meaning of true love and the promise of healing in the face of heartbreak.

Skipping a Beat is creative, honest and emotional. Pekkanen's writing style reminds me of a chat with an dear college friend. Bottom line: Go get it (it comes out in Feb). Read it. Share it.

Discloure: This post serves as entry into a sweepstakes and I received a free copy of the book to review.

His Excellency: George Washington - A Review

2011-02-07T15:23:00.000-08:00

I've made a vow to myself this year to read more books, but not just books in general -- a specific kind of book. Namely: historical biographies. I kicked off my new goal with His Excellency: George Washington by Joseph J. Ellis. Although I've studied Washington before, I focused more on what he did rather than who he was. This biography certainly filled in the gaps and gave me tremendous insight into Washington's personality and character.

The more I read, the more I started to understand the man behind the wooden teeth (which, by the way, are a myth). Before reading this book, my perception of Washington was that he was a brilliant, rather unemotional, focused man. Of course, this idea was based purely on the facts of history and the stoic pictures we see of him (many of which, by the way, are grossly inaccurate). Ellis uses Washington's personal and public correspondence to create a vivid picture of a man who was passionate, socially savvy, respected and determined.

It's funny because we are constantly hearing about how polarized this country is and how explosive the political scene is today. But, Washington was faced with the seemingly impossible challenges of defeating the greatest military power in the world with a rag-tag militia, creating a viable government when every leader seemed to have a different idea of how things should be and staying true to his truly independent point of view when political parties were just beginning to surface. It seems Washington's time was just as contentious and ours (maybe more so).

This book is extremely readable and not at all intimidating as many historical biographies can be. In a time when the freedoms and essence of this country are at risk, tapping into Washington's vision for the United States helps put it all in perspective....so go read it. :-)

It's just a 'stew' kind of day...

2011-01-31T16:26:00.000-08:00

I'm not a huge fan of the Today Show, but I do like to check out their cooking segments. They tend to coordinate with the seasons, which sometimes helps me get out of a cooking rut (you know the one when you make the same 5 things over and over and over again). I often run out the door right after I see a recipe that I like to gather the ingredients and try it out that night. It happened again this morning.

Today, Ellie Krieger demonstrated two yummy, comforting recipes for a heart healthy segment. This appealed to me because it's snowing outside and I love to cook warm, hearty meals in weather like this. Also, Krieger is a nutritionist and she talked about how these recipes are heart- and cholesterol-friendly. Who wouldn't love that?
I made it to the store before the weather turned horrible and I was looking forward to cooking dinner all day long. After spending 2 hours cleaning the kitchen, I proceeded to destroy it again to make Krieger's Aromatic Beef Stew with Butternut Squash. I wouldn't have thought beef would be included in a heart-healthy recipe, but it's all about moderation. I only used a pound of stew meat for 5 people. Enough to get the idea, but definitely not meat-heavy.

This stew just made me smile. It was full of flavor and a little spicy. It gave my stomach a big ol' hug -- much needed on a day like today. Oh, and it was EASY to make. Promise.

Recipe: Ellie Krieger's Aromatic Beef Stew with Butternut Squash

Ingredients
2 teaspoons olive oil
1 pound stew beef (round or chuck), cut into chunks
1 large onion, chopped
1 tablespoon minced peeled fresh ginger
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 pound peeled cubed butternut squash, cut into 1[1/2]-inch cubes (about 2[1/2] cups)
One 14.5-ounce can no-salt-added diced tomatoes
One 8-ounce can no-salt-added tomato sauce
1 1/2 cups low-sodium beef broth
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
3 cups cooked whole-wheat couscous
1/4 cup sliced almonds, toasted in a dry skillet over medium-high heat, stirring frequently, until golden brown and fragrant, about 2 minutes
4 teaspoons minced fresh parsley

Preparation
Far from your run-of-the-mill beef stew, this one transports you to another land with a unique combination of everyday ingredients. In it tender beef is nestled with chunks of sweet butternut squash in a rich Moroccan spiced tomato sauce. That exotic inspiration continues as it is served over fluffy couscous and topped with crunchy almonds. It’s just as easy, if not easier, than the same-old stew, but so much more rewarding.

Heat the oil in a 4-quart saucepan over medium-high heat. Add the beef and cook until browned on all sides, about 5 minutes. Transfer the meat to a plate, leaving the juices in the saucepan. Add the onion and cook, stirring, until softened and translucent, about 6 minutes. Add the ginger and garlic and cook, stirring, for 1 additional minute. Return the beef to the pot and stir in the squash, diced tomatoes, tomato sauce, beef broth, cumin, cinnamon, and red pepper flakes. Bring to a boil, then reduce the heat to a simmer. Cover and cook until the beef is tender, 30 to 35 minutes.

Spoon the stew over the couscous, and sprinkle each serving with almonds and parsley.

No, kids, life is NOT fair. Deal with it.

2011-01-15T21:03:00.001-08:00

My 6-year-old is on a "life is not fair" kick. If you're a mom of a child that can talk, you know what I'm talking about. It doesn't matter what we do, somehow circumstances leave her feeling inadequately equipped to handle the situation. She always wants more (or less depending on the 'thing' in question) and compares her lot to whomever happens to be in the immediate vicinity.

If her brother happens to land in the seat in front of her favorite bowl, you guessed it: "It's not fair." If her sister's favorite song comes on the radio and I cannot magically instruct the DJ to play hers next, "That's not fair." If she has to clean the shower and her (3 year old) sister has to wipe down the counter, here it comes: "This is sooo not fair!" You know what? She's absolutely right. It's NOT fair....and it never will be.

Clearly kids are born with the inane ability to distinguish inequality, especially when it comes to something that they want more/less of. It's human nature. Still, the reality is that life is not fair. It never was and no matter how much you cry and scream about it, that truth will remain.

I realize that in between my generation and my kids' generation is a generation of kids that grew up with the false assumption that life is fair. Subsequently, they feel entitled to....well, pretty much everything. I realize this is not a popular statement, but most people in the aforementioned "middle" generation would be shocked to know that they do not have a right to a job, to health care (at least under the federal government), to a house....just by virtue of breathing. They do have a right to acquire those things...if they have the means to do so.

I hope to teach my kids that they will gain that for which they are willing to work. Work requires effort and sacrifice and it's not always fun...still, it is required. Perhaps they will be surprised to realize that their perception of their quality of life is in direct proportion to their ingenuity, effort, education and implementation of their vision.

I want my kids to know that we succeed and fail on our own accord. Contrary to what some think, the fact that life is not fair is what makes this country the greatest, most exceptional country in the history of countries. Someday, I hope they will celebrate the fact that life is not fair rather than whine about it. That someday feels pretty far away right now...

What's your legacy??

2010-11-26T14:51:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking about this for a while now, but have recently committed to exploring a new avenue of writing. You may recall me blogging about my kind-hearted neighbor who, even in the midst of personal tragedy, still exemplified exceptional kindness and generosity. Well, her husband passed away shortly after that post and, since then, I've been able to learn a bit more about her.

We've spent time talking about her childhood, her love story and her family. As a student of history, she's captivated me with her personal vignettes. I didn't take long for me to offer to document her personal history for the benefit of her family and future generations. Her response, though heart-warming, shocked me a bit. At first, she was reluctant to acknowledge that anyone would be interested in her story. She also said that she and her husband talked about how they never wrote any of their memories down. After hearing that, I was 100% on board.

We're starting the process next week and I'm really excited about it. I plan on interviewing her 2-3 different times, transcribing her feedback, editing it and producing a complete history in bound-book form (along with a CD of the audio recordings). If it goes well, I may offer these services professionally for other families and individuals.

So, what are your thoughts? Have you considered documenting your own personal history, or the history of an aging relative? Do you think preserving personal history (in hard copy form) is important? Why or why not?

If you know my mom (or have a mom), read this

2010-10-20T08:53:00.000-07:00

**I know this a tad long for a blog post, but indulge me, especially if you know my mom***

Over the course of my life, I've never been told I look like my mom. My younger sister heard it often, but me? My mother and I look nothing alike. She is fair-skinned, 5’3” with blue eyes and blond hair. I am olive-skinned, 5’8” with hazel eyes and brown hair. Our personalities are quite different as well. She is the consummate mediator and resident saint. I have a temper and struggle with forgiveness. Everyone (and I do mean that literally) who has ever met my mother falls in love with her free spirit, easy-going attitude and her teary-eyed laugh. She is the ultimate comforter, a skilled listener and a compassionate soul. I, on the other hand, make friends at a snail’s pace, am more of an introvert and am hesitant to become emotionally-vested in anyone’s life beyond my familial circle.

Growing up, my friends flocked to my mother and she was always there to listen, guide and hug. While I have always adored my mom, seeing how effortlessly she diffused heated situations and calmed frayed nerves caused me to feel a bit distant from her. I just could never relate to or understand her selfless motivation. How could she constantly put her own needs and interests on the back-burner so that she could nurture the needs and interests of others? She would not think twice about completely disappearing into the life of her children, if it meant that we would flourish.

I remember looking at pictures of my mom from her grade school days searching for some hint of my nose, eyes or even ears. I wanted so badly to look like her but my fruitless search left me asking, "Who are you? What are your dreams and aspirations?” I’ve never really known the answer. I do know that the answer changed once I and my siblings entered the scene. Perhaps the little girl in the white lace dress smiling back at me from those black and white photos dreamed of a life full of adventurous escapades, exotic travel and lavish celebrations. Perhaps.

But life unfolds, as life tends to do. As the path of her journey progressed from one of endless possibility to a clearly marked paved road, my mother’s aspirations for herself obviously changed. We became the embodiment of her dream. My mom has always been so incredibly happy watching us bloom. Subsequently, her support, love and warmth have been constants in our lives. She has been an unwavering example of grace, mercy and kindness. When I was completely unlovable, she always loved. When I was utterly incorrigible, she encouraged. When I gave into my anger, she wrapped her arms around me and softened the pain, all while expecting nothing in return.

It really wasn’t until I had children of my own that I actually recognized a common thread between us. I too have no problem disappearing into my children so that they may flourish. Even though we live hundreds of miles apart, I learn from my mom every day. Whatever challenge my children present, I tap into the wisdom that she instilled in me and try my best to show them the same love that she showed me.

I'll probably never look like my mom. I'm ok with that now. But, the older I get, the less important it is for me to resemble her in appearance and the more I strive to resemble her in character. If someone sees my mom in me, through my actions, demeanor or in the way I relate to my kids, I’ll consider myself a success.

Moi? An inspiration? Stop it right now.

2010-10-17T15:43:00.000-07:00

Most days, I certainly do not feel inspirational as I'm just trying to hold the various moving parts of my life together. But, then again, I suppose most mothers can relate. Recently, my friend via the blogosphere, Wendy Irene, asked me to contribute to her Interviews for Inspiration segment for her Give Love, Create Happiness blog.

The idea that we mothers can really find inspiration and encouragement in each other is just fantastic...and true. How could I not contribute? The best part...in doing so, I learned a lot about myself and was energized by the process of defining my answers to her questions. Thanks for the exercise in self-discovery, Wendy! Check out my interview here.

Flashing back....

2010-10-14T17:32:00.000-07:00

I started riding horses when I was 5. My little sister went to pre-school on a farm in NJ and when my mom went to pick her up, I would go visit the horses. At first, I leaned on the fence, then I stuck my heard through the fence, then I climbed on the fence, then I forgot the fence was even there. Ever since then, there was no turning back.

I wouldn't recognize my life without horses, and I don't want to even consider the thought. Some of my fondest memories of my childhood involved spending hours and hours at the barn, riding, cleaning tacks, mucking stalls, feeding, and generally soaking up wisdom. Sometimes I would just sit in the pasture with the horses and just....be. I couldn't think of another place I'd rather be.

Recently, I've been blessed with an opportunity to lease an amazing horse (Mags) who is absolutely perfect for us. She is a saint with Eden, who has just learned to post the trot, and she is an eventing school master. Today we pulled up to the barn and Eden said, "It smells soooo good here." I could not be more proud.

Watching Eden learn to ride and interact with Mags sparks flash backs every day. Although I'm definitely not forcing her to ride, she clearly wants to be there with me and, right now, I'm just enjoying the common bond we share. As she grows up, my hope is that it will still be there...because I know what horses can do to a girl. Since she already appreciates the smell of leather, manure and dirt, there's pretty much no turning back. :-)

If you ever wanted to be a makeup artist in a strip club...

2010-10-02T08:02:00.000-07:00

....this book is for you. Actually, it's for anyone who is passionate about the makeup/beauty industry. Well, really it's for anyone who is remotely curious about the life of a makeup artist.

I dabble in makeup. Meaning, I occasionally try to put it on. It's definitely not my forte' but I'm in awe of people who do it well and can transform a face with a few strokes of a makeup brush. For that reason alone, I had a hard time putting The Lipstick Classified by Karen Cecilia down once I started reading.

As an industry insider, Cecilia dishes on the fabulous (and not so fabulous) world of a professional makeup artist. The book (which is a super fast and entertaining read) includes a collection of Cecilia's published articles, which are engaging and definitely manageable (length-wise). Yes, she shares her experience as a makeup artist at a strip club (talk about hard work!!!) but she also shares valuable makeup tips. As soon as I finished the book, I ran to my bathroom to try her trick for mimicking airbrushed foundation...and it worked!

Overall, The Lipstick Classified is a funny, honest escape. I definitely recommend it, even if you are completely inept at putting on makeup (like me).

Love in Mid-Air....a review

2010-09-20T08:39:00.000-07:00

If you're contemplating an affair, don't read this book....or maybe read it. I'm not sure if it will empower you to act on your impulse or if it will dissuade you from moving forward with your tryst. Either way, Love in Mid-Air by Kim Wright is simply a captivating read. It definitely feel more like a diary than a novel in some instances.

The main character, Elyse, takes us through her journey from a young woman intrigued by the idea of marriage, to a mother and wife struggling to hold on to her identity, to the daring and brazen mistress who guiltlessly tours the country with her lover, one city at a time. Wright provides the reader with an intimate portrait of the guts of Elyse's affair, marriage and friendships. Although some of the dialog made me blush (literally!), every word contributed to the complexity of the plot, which was often unexpected, sometimes painful and always alluring.

I've never met Wright but, based on this novel, I am guessing she's not shy and I would love to sit down for coffee and a chat. I imagine we'd talk about female friendships and how difficult it can be to truly connect with women...as well as the importance of a true, solid friend. I would probably lean in closer to her and whisper as I asked about the writing process of this book. Her writing is brave, raw and honest. I love it.

Grab this book and read it. It will devour you, as you devour it.